FUEL for The Men

Welcome to the Pit Stop for our Faithful Men on the Mentoring Road. No matter how successful you are, everyone needs to be refueled. Take some time, browse and see what you need to ‘fill up’.

Topics:
* Responding to youth’s bad decisions
* Everyone struggles

How should I respond?

It will happen sooner or later. So what do you do when your mentee or mentee’s friend or family member has done something you disagree with on moral/religious grounds. Sometimes a direct message of disagreement may be in order. But other times, there may be more useful ways to help youth see their errors themselves.

Below are a few questions that can help lead a kid to the heart of an issue and to productive decision making in their own heart.

What do you think about what you/they did?

I can’t say I understand why you/they did that. Why do you think you/they did it?

How did that help you/their situation?

What kinds of problems may happen if they did it again?

Is there anyone who might get hurt by this decision

What did you learn through this?

If your family/God/hero saw you/them do this, what would they think?

How can this decision help you meet your goals?

Is there anything you would do differently based on what you know now?

Jesus did a masterful job asking questions to help people “see”. You can too.

There’s Value in the Struggle

A Sudanese refugee once asked an American father to help him teach his son “how to be a man in your country.” The father’s first reaction was that he immediately felt lost, confused, and seriously challenged. If this question were asked of you:

What actions would you take?
What do you feel is important for the boy to know?
What would be important for the boy to experience?
What values would be critical to communicate to a young man today?
What man would you hold up as a positive role model?

Now watch this video, with your eyes closed.

Does that do something for you in being a man???

Here are the words to the commercial:

It’s not just the strength of action, it’s the strength of honor.
Not just the strength to follow, but to lead.
Not just the strength to push, but the strength to push yourself.
It’s more than physical strength. It’s the strength to carry the days that weigh the most.

There’s no doubt we would like these words to be applied to ourselves, our boys and our mentees.

But if you were to be asked what kinds of things turn boys into men, eventually the discussion would turn to the idea of ‘struggle’. And this fits with a biblical theme: James 1:2-4

“Consider it all joy, my brethren, when you encounter various trials, knowing that the testing of your faith produces endurance. And let endurance have its perfect result, so that you may be perfect and complete, lacking in nothing.”

As a mentor you will face a variety of trails. Sometimes its a kid who just will not respond or show interest, or maybe a family who moves regularly and forgets to give you their new address and phone number. We’ve also seen mentees who struggle with drugs, alcohol, sex, and repeated arrests. These frustrating times can make a mentor wonder whether their time of influence is coming to an end.

But maybe the struggle is really a reminder you are right where you should be.

So, “Do not throw away your confidence, which has a great reward. For you have need of endurance, so that when you have done the will of God, you may receive what was promised.” Hebrews 10:35,36